"there were times when I missed the adventure, even the danger, of the real war out in the boonies. It's a hard thing to explain to somebody who hasn't felt it, but the presence of death and danger has a way of bringing you fully awake. It makes things vivid. When you're afraid, really afraid, you see things you never saw before, you pay attention to the world. You make close friends. You become part of a tribe and you share the same blood—you give it together, you take it together."After finishing the chapter, I started grappling with the question "How Does O'Brien Portray War in the story The Ghost Soldiers?" Does the book make me want to experience war on not? The quote on page 181 makes me feel like Im missing out on a life changing experience. I've never felt the presence of death and danger so close to me. I've never been afraid for my life like O'Brien has. It seems like these experiences are thrilling and self-revealing for soldiers. It makes me want to go through these types of experiences to see a world I've never seen before. I've played team sports all throughout my life and I have felt the brotherly bond that is developed. War is a whole new level. Being together in the face of death and fighting for each other can't even be compared to team sports.
At the same time, O'Brien also portrays war negatively in several revealing instances. On pages 190 and 191, O'Brien talks about how he had come to the war as an innocent, quit, thoughtful, young person who had just graduated college. He says that over the course of the war, he had "turned mean inside". He says that he "now felt a deep coolness inside, something dark, and even". Then he goes on to say that he is capable of evil. He implies that before the war he would never have felt the need to hurt Bobby Jorgensen after what happened on the battlefield. O'Brien makes it clear that these feeling he feels are a direct result of the war. The word evil that O'Brien uses is powerful. The war brought out an evil in him. This self-analysis that O'Brien does makes war seem especially unattractive and cruel. I would never want to experience something that would harden me to a harmful level.
Throughout the book, each story that O'Brien writes seems to portray the effects of the war differently. O'Brien never seems to mention whether or not the war was "worth it" or "not worth it". There are several positive things about the war and several negative ones and O'Brien doesn't chose a side. Going back to my question"Does the book make me want to experience war on not?". I'm not sure.
O'Brien only talks about missing the war because he was so accustomed to it. I truly believe him when he says it makes you feel alive yet there are so many negatives that come with it. Sure you can develop a close bond with your fellow soldiers but that just makes it all the more devastating when one of them dies. The adrenaline of being a firefight is countered by the fear of being shot/killed. For me, O'Brien's description of war only serves to confirm the authenticity of his experiences.
ReplyDeleteI kind of agree with you on this point Varun, that O'Brien does describe a life-changing event in his life - whether or not it's for the better we don't know. After reading his stories, I sometimes kind of get the same rush of energy after I watch good war movies, that kind of "IM SO READY" adrenaline rush. However, on the question of whether or not I would want to experience the war, I'd have to stick with a firm "no". If I really want to experience that rush and bond, I might as well go into a simulator of war or have a dream about it. Though this is still nothing compared to the real dangers of war and the bonds created from it (as we are reassured that we will come out alive from the simulators), I feel that going through war still wouldn't be worth it. This might sound kinda weird, but I'd rather have the experience of rock climbing and hanging onto my friend and the edge of the cliff: it's just as life-threatening, but at least you have time to plan how to get up on the cliff. In war, after a couple of minutes with an open wound, your butt might start rotting off.
ReplyDeleteThis book does give a good sense of the kind of camaraderie and unique friendship that develops among soldiers, and "The Ghost Soldiers" is an especially ambiguous case: O'Brien aligns us with him and Azar as they plot out this sick practical joke, and there's something potent about being "in on" the joke in this way that makes it seem fun (if also wrong). But as the plot proceeds, and it starts to resemble combat more and more, Tim feels increasingly uncomfortable, to the point where he badly wants the whole thing to just end and wishes he never got involved. There is a nostalgia for the time when he was part of the company, and he definitely feels left out of that dynamic now that he has a "cushy" assignment. But being part of Alpha company also got him shot in the ass, and overall it was a deeply traumatic experience that he's still sorting out more than 20 years later.
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